A New Year that holds BIG Possibilities

The other night, I was listening to someone talk about New Year's Resolutions and that the reason most of us fail to accomplish them is because they are based on our own expectations and desired results and not on God's.

At the beginning of 2010, I was bound and determined to update this blog more frequently...alas, it did not happen. Let me assure you though, that does not mean there were not countless blog-worthy stories...In fact, in the time between the last post and now, He has taught me that my expectations and desires don't really matter that much and that the plans He has are much more beautiful and exciting than I could ever imagine.

My last post was a story from the Sea Tribe Trip that I went on in April. On that trip, there was a stirring in my heart to seek what the Lord might have next for me...after the 2010-2011 school year. BAIS has been my home for three and a half years now. He has established a place for me here, shaping and molding me into a totally new version of myself. He's blessed me with an incredible support system of brothers and sisters that sharpen and challenge me in every conversation we have. He's totally rocked my world! With that being said, you can imagine I was a bit taken aback when He said that this year would be my last. Despite what He's taught me about His faithfulness and how He knows the big picture, I still try to put Him in a box and couldn't help but ask, "Really? Are you sure? I am pretty sure that teaching kids is all I've got..."
Over the next several months, He continued to provide a peace that I still can't quite describe about the thought of me leaving here. At the same time, He was pressing some other things on my heart. One of those things being Human Trafficking and possibly working with trafficked women and children. I started doing some research and reading up on what He's doing in this part of the world through ministries that help prevent, prosecute, rescue and rehabilitate. He continued placing people in my path who had connections to various ministries and my pool of contacts continued to grow. Literally every time I would mention this to anyone, they would tell me of someone they know who is working with a ministry like this somewhere in Asia. I had several contacts in Thailand, Cambodia and India, so I decided that I was going to use my vacation time to explore some of these options. Emphasis on the I part of that sentence...I had grand plans for me to go to all these places and figure out what I was going to do next. When the doors started to close on those endeavors, discouragement set in and I started to question Him again. He reminded me that He hasn't left me or forsaken me, that His plans and His timing is perfect and that I just needed to wait. I surrendered my desires, plans and control and trusted that He was going to do what He wanted...I now see that His plan was to address that doubt that I mentioned earlier...that teaching is all I've got...

At the beginning of December, I was able to go on a short trip with some teachers to visit an island in the Riau that we visited a couple years ago on a Sea Tribe trip. The elementary school there got the lowest test scores out of all the elementary schools in that area and they are spending the next year working on getting them up. We were asked to bring our knowledge and experience to the teachers in a two day workshop. We were also asked to revamp their library and teach them how to use their resources. It was an incredible experience to be able to use and share the giftings that He's given us to bless this school and demonstrate His love to them. Not only were we able to give them some practical tools and creative strategies to use in their classroom, but we also got to rock it HGTV style and redecorate their library. Through this experience, I learned the creativity with which He uses the giftings of His children.

This past week, I went to Central Java with some friends of mine who've been speaking and ministering to Indonesian churches all over the country. The plan was to spend some time with high school and college students, practicing their English and sharing stories with them of America with the ultimate goal and sharing the Truth with them. We met with small groups for three days and He worked in HUGE ways. I love how He works outside my comfort zone. Throughout the three days, I was able to go pretty deep with the students in my group, talking about friendship, forgiveness, heaven and ultimately giving them the opportunity to accept JC. It was unbelievable how He worked through me. Again, I learned that the gifts He's given me can be used in any capacity, all that's required of me in surrender and complete reliance on Him.

Today, I am hopping a plane to Bangkok, Thailand. Yeah, turns out not all of the doors closed. I will be visiting a couple ministries there that work with trafficked women and children. I am going by myself and expecting nothing but big things from Him.

So, He knows the big picture. He knows what this year holds and although He's not filling me in on exactly what it is, He continues to provide evidence of His faithfulness and sovereignty. In the meantime, I will walk with Him and follow wherever He leads praying for eyes to see and ears to hear where that might be.

I could come up with all kinds of New Year's Resolutions to figure out my future and plan it out, but that would all be in vain, because it would be based on what I want. Instead, I will choose to wait on Him, expecting BIG things for 2011.