R.A.F.T.- ing

Well, there's nothing like a graduation to make you realize that the end really is near.

Wednesday afternoon was the graduation ceremony of the Class of 2011, oh how I love them! During my first year here when I taught this class P.E., even though they kind of drove me crazy, I thought it would be pretty awesome if I were able to stay long enough to see them graduate...and here I am watching them graduate and getting ready to say goodbye to this place along with them...On June 11th, I board a plane with a one-way ticket back to America.

I've been refusing to count down the days, but when it's down to single digits, there's just no denying it. The truth is, I don't know how to leave here, I don't know how to tell this place goodbye. I've been trying to be intentional with people and tackle the art of farewell in small bites, but it still feels like an overwhelming task.

At the very same time, I am filled with anticipation as I think about what the next year holds. Weddings, reunions, grocery stores with an abundance of cereal options, new friends, new adventures. Oh man, how does one manage all these emotions and looming changes?!

The answer: By His grace alone and with a little help from...a lovely model that I learned at our Pre-Field Orientation.

Join me as I build my RAFT...

R (reconcile)--As one who struggles with pride and justification, this is not something that I am very great at. Fortunately, since I first arrived I've been learning the beauty of speaking and receiving the truth in love and keeping short accounts with others in this community. Along the way, I've said to much, not said enough, offended, insulted and miscommunicated. One group that I will need to make sure to reconcile with are my beloved 5th graders. It's been a hard year and, especially in this last quarter, each Bible Class has felt like an intervention. In reconciling with them I want to make sure that they leave my class knowing that underneath all the lectures, mean teacher voice moments and minutes taken away from free time was a deep love and desire to see them become the young men and women God has created them to be.

While in the process of reconciliation, I realized there are some aspects of Indonesia that need reconciliation...

1. The Rain--I have a deep disdain for the rain in this country. It ruins my plans, my shoes, my hair and my ability to safely drive my motorbike. The other night, though, I went on a run and within 5 minutes it started to pour. There was nothing left to do but embrace it. I finished my run and then just stood in the rain soaking it in. In that moment, I do believe that rain and I reconciled.

2. Traffic--The closer I get to the end, the greater my hatred grows for the traffic in this town. In the last month, I have found myself literally screaming aloud at the ridiculousness of driving habits. On a motorbike, it's not easy to be subtle in that. I am not sure what it's going to look like to reconcile with traffic, perhaps I will have to pray for those that make me crazy.

Lord, thank you for the ultimate demonstration of reconciliation through the death of your Son. I ask that you'd grant me the humility, grace and words to reconcile with those that I've wronged. Help me to spend the last few days loving fiercely on the people in this country.

A (affirm)--Indonesia, God has used you to break, pound and grind me down to one who fears her King, listens for His voice and is able to recognize and participate in His grace. You've given me eyes to see the beauty in differences and opportunities that have stretched me farther than I thought I was capable of. Thank you for Sambal, sate kambing, rambutan, and kopi susu. Thank you for motorbikes, outlet stores and cream baths. Thank you for KARAOKE, endless amounts of restaurants, and random adventures. You've frustrated me and made me laugh, burdened me and made me cry. There will always be a place in my heart for Indonesia.

F (farewell)--This is my least favorite part of this RAFTing thing, because it usually includes tears. I always think of that moment at the airport after I've said goodbye to my family, but I can still see them as I wait in line for security. Me turning around and waving every 30 seconds looking like a mess as I take my shoes off or pull my laptop out of the case. Ugh, I hate that.

But alas, it must happen. For me, I think my final farewell to Indonesia will be as I take off in the plane looking down through tear-filled eyes at the red-orange tiled rooves and palm trees...exactly how our first hello went.

T (Think Destination)--This stage results in a combination of excitement, sadness, and anxiety. I am so excited to get to spend some solid time in Flagstaff, one of my most favorite places in the world, with some of the most important people in my life. I can't wait to reconnect with and love on people. I am also super excited to participate in the celebration of both my sisters getting married, but I struggle to fully grasp all the changes I will face in the next three months. On top of that, I can't help but be anxious for what it's going to mean for me to be an adult in America. Last summer was hard enough when I learned that I could just stick my checks in the ATM to make a deposit...that was CrAzY! Oh man, do they even use checks anymore in America?! I have a feeling I am going to feel like an alien on a new planet for a while, but it's even more difficult when you look like someone who should know how the system works!! Que sera sera. I am sure it will result in some hilariously blog-worthy stories.

But, America is not the only destination I am thinking of these days...

In January I will be participating in a six month internship with Word Made Flesh in Bangkok, Thailand with the couple that I met back in January. It's so neat to see how this opportunity is a beautiful combination of all the things that God has put on my heart in the last year and a half. The internship will include ministering to prostitutes in the bars of the Red Light District as well as street kids and their families. Tim and Amy are hoping to create a small resource/learning center to help minister to the needs of those families which is where my education background comes in a bit. There are a lot of details that I am still unsure about including living situation and exact cost, but I am definitely "thinking destination" as I look forward to what He has in store for this next season.

Wow, the RAFT is built and there's one week until I board that plane. Once again, relying on my own strength will result in utter failure, so I turn to Psalm 55:22 "Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall."

Thank you for joining me on this Indonesian teaching adventure. It was by your prayers that the last four years have been so full of His goodness, power and provision. I am forever grateful.